I was having a conversation with my girl friend a while ago. The topic came back to my mind last night so I have decided to write about it. She had asked me "Cari, do you believe there's 'The One' out there for you?" My answer was "Yes and no."
Call me cynical but I don't believe in destiny or that things were meant to be. Those are words people say to reassure themselves that what good things that have happened to them was not something that occurred due to pure luck and chance.
I believe that anyone can be The One. It is commonly heard from couples who ended up breaking up with each other utter the phrase "It wasn't meant to be" or "I guess s/he wasn't The One." Bullshit. You were just too lazy to give the relationship a real effort. You just stopped liking them enough to try. I believe every couple could work out as long as both parties still want to be together. This is why arranged marriages worked out before. You don't see my grandparents divorcing even though they've never met each other until their wedding day. No, it's not because they were destined to be together. It's because they try to stay together.
The One isn't going to be some out-of-this-world guy that's perfectly made for you. That's a fairy tale, kids. Relationships are all about working together.
So, The One for you can be anyone you choose. So long as they feel the same way about you then you two can work it out somehow.
My friend said "I think because I don't believe in The One that I'll never experience love like you hear about in stories." I agreed. Because we don't believe it we don't let ourselves feel that way. Love isn't like what we see in movies. I say we all realize this one day or another. But that's okay. It doesn't mean we can't be happy. It just means we won't be stupid.
